Relapse

Clawing my way back into that bubble
nudging my head into the side to slip in
clutching my body close to my chin
falling back into the same old routine.
rising and retreating my breasts to the sky
this breathing is harder for me since that guy
swallowing scratches my throat piece by piece
croaking 'til this wallowing does cease.
choking on my reasons why
retching on my pathetic excuse
addicted to a substance
i cant even abuse
i hate the person that i've become
i hate my new skin it skinks of weakness
gulping down a reason why
i cant be who i was before that guy
tear aways the layers of mellow
keep on going past my muscle
till you reach the window viewing
of my soul, there you will see
a tiny box with a tiny key
a tiny shred i kept of me.